Assumptions



Assumptions   can be defined as imaginations that may be contrary to the facts. It is employed in every individuals mind at one time or the other, assumptions are mostly contrary to reality and rarely true, and this has largely affected relationships.  Imagine, most  breakups that  has resulted in  relationships are  due to accusations of unfaithfulness by other partners, and most times pride, anger, lies  blindfold them from seeing or accepting reality, that is why it is said that one should not make decisions when emotionally  disturbed. Different  factors cause assumptions  and fuel  it,                                                                                     -Lack  of  trust, Deception,  Insufficient  communication  between partners, Anger, Jealousy, Lies  etc  Why not find out the real fact or verify the account of your partner concerning the issues, you do not know,  you may be saving a beautiful relationship. Now, let us see, how can  we  get rid of or neutralize the effect  of assumptions? Let us  look at a story  of a guy.
Andrea  Clifton.
Andrea’s  first  love, fani,  someone he can not joke with, this girl caused the major  changes in his life- thought him how to love, he did not look at her social class, to him, love was real. ‘every of my time, even when am  not in good terms with her, I would gladly  accept to dedicate my life to her, don’t really care what any one had to say……..’,to  andrea, his  major  challenge  was  brown, though brown  was  his friend, brown to  him  usually shows this extraordinary tenderness to fani that he himself was  not comfortable with, and  fani was receptive to this tenderness but not in love with  brown, she sensed this uneasiness  in andrea, and often times reassures him.  ‘………but after  escaping from that  party my dad forced me to attend, and  entering  fani’s house at exactly past eight, knowing well that I was late for her birthday  again, greeted her  mum, and on heading to her room, cause I couldn’t find her any where else, I  heard  browm’s  soft  laughter, the door  was  left  ajar, and  looking in I found them holding hands, I had to leave immediately.’ Andrea broke up his relationship with Brown, stopped talking to fani for  nearly two months,  Fani’s  increasing depression  led  to her mum’s  intervention in the matter, hence, Andrea  found out that  Fani was sick  that day and was worried that he wasn’t showing up, and   brown had explained to them why he wasn’t  going to be around, her mum  had asked him and other friends  to stay around  and keep her occupied till he comes. Andrea  later apologized.
This  little example shows a minor effect of assumption- a break up, in other cases this  problem had led to  divorce, end of relationship, death, amongst others. How can we avoid assuming?
-Take some time away from the person to control your nerves, not to long to lose the relationship.
-Get information from right sources on what actually happened and led to the problem.
-Verify the information, and if your partner is innocent, remove pride and apologize.
-Avoid listening to some people, including friends, who tell you things not physically verifiable by you about your partner-Deception and Lies.
-Communicate  effectively  with your partner.
-Face the fact and nothing less.