Translate

Friday, November 25, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving Holiday!

Happy Thanksgiving Holiday !

Monday, November 14, 2016

Love and it's many faces.


Love, a major topic. Yes, Love is a major topic everywhere, some have misconceptions about it, some paint it the way they want, some design it to what fits them. All and the same, Love is one, yet with different faces. Love, has only one name, but reveals itself in different areas. It is found in the impeccable string that binds us with our creator, that, described as the ultimate love, it is found in the romantic ties, it is found in the bounds between friends, it is found in the undying intricate hold between a mother and a child, yeah the dads are unjustly considered passive in this area.

So, how would you define love. Yet, I would say love has not been given a perfect definition if it has all this faces yet one name. This is because, this different areas are largely unique. Would I have the definition to it then? I am more than certain to say that God is Love, because that is what the bible says. This doesn't include the rest of the earthy attachment kind of feeling. Then, the bible is describing another kind of love, maybe that is actually what should be called love, and the different kinds we feel could be given a separate name. Nevertheless, the bible says, 'Love one another', that is, the way God loves. Most of the earthy love is conditional, with a huge exceptional difference to the mother to child love.

Most enter a romantic relationship with the fantasy that there will never arise a passive feeling that could lead to a split. Now, the world has indeed learned that love must go with a commitment to be able to sustain any relationship. If two in a romantic relationship can find it passive later, is that then love? Or is it the commitment that makes it bind? Love on it's own does not suggest an end in itself. Hence, we must have commitment with affection in this area to make it work.

Friends find themselves in ties that brightens the length of their days, if and only if this friends are true, loyal and gifts in themselves. Yet, sometimes, Jealousy arises and no one is to be trusted. I tell you, some people at the end become good friends indeed  even if we are not to trust anyone. This happens most times if we trust only God who is able to guide their (our so called friends) hearts to work in favor of us and us in favor of them, if not, it may not work because the principal of trusting has already been set. It is just enough to believe that our friends have good will in their heart for us, not for us to trust them. I say this because it has been found that if we trust any, it would't take long before they fail. This could be direct or indirect as most of them will try all their best to stay true or keep their words or promises which could be passive or somewhat serious.

The mother and child love is a blessing, it is a blessing to guide, to care to persevere in hard times naturally. This love has most of the time being found to be true. Irrespective of this, caution should be taken as most mothers have given strong love that is in it's true worth weak. This kind of love can be likened to the kind that spoils and misleads, the kind that allows everything and will not be able to save the young in the time of need because wisdom, knowledge was lacking.


I hence would say that as we all see all this different areas as love, we should take note that in all, most of this faces of love, (except one, God's) have one or more faults or weakness, imperfections that does not qualify them to be termed love which they are called. This is because Love suggests in itself  a perfection. Then, the question is, the earthy love description we know, are they some how a lessened kind of love? Nevertheless, we are instructed to love one another in the only one perfect love.

Monday, September 26, 2016

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Love and Commitment.





It is one thing to Love and another to be committed to that love. This is applicable to all relationship types. Hence, we are prompted to ask if commitment is greater than love, since it can really sustain a relationship. Join me as I ask Prof. James Ford, Professor in English and philosophy,  few questions concerning this.

Monday, August 22, 2016

Voddie Baucham - Love and Marriage (Full Series:





                                                 I am so excited to introduce Voddie Baucham to you all. Trust me, everyone needs to hear what he has to say about Love and Marriage especially those intending to get married or planning to date. I have recommended his series a lot of times to many! He is good!

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

The Last Voice.


Now, let's assume you were right on a hot argument or after a long fight, silence broke out, and this silence from both sides was just an unconscious acknowledgment of you being right all this while. And then, you being in the spotlight, decided to re-emphazise your importance to them all, unknowing to you, pride sets in, and you unconsciously go beyond the topic in the bid to sell your  self imortance to everyone; This is what I call the 'Last Voice'. Even though you may be thinking that, this scenario has nothing wrong with it, like, it's not bad to show off our self worth, I  will say that in this process, we should try to become careful, because if the level of pride we allow in us  is not controlled, fall, or falling will be the next phase, the relevant characters we have built could come crashing down before us, and our good aim to resolve issues could go unfinished. 

It is a known fact; even though it's process is rather slow, and could also come fast depending on what fate decides to do, that when pride kicks in, falling could follow.  In this case, talking about the last voice, here I refer to originally good individuals,  institutions, groups, etc.  This individuals or groups did not have an
initial intention of embarking on the rough roads of pride, that is, they did not intend to boost of anything they have or will acquire,  they have no intention of taking pride in anything at all that have made them the privileged, but they could not control it, they could not control the pride that sprang forth as a result of their hard earned work, or that the accusations on them were removed because they were found innocent,  hence after speaking their minds, they let their pride take its full course.

If we allow the last voice to go on speaking, it could sabotage in minutes what we have worked hard for in years. The initial stage of this destruction is of the character,  it destroys your character as you won't be able to control what you say, and hence, won't be able to account for them. Have you ever being in a situation where by you wished you could take back your words? Or wished to have used a different set of words instead of what you used earlier?  But you can not, and you can't resolve it and it goes on destroying your cherished relationships; be it within your home, private or a public affair. 

Our good aims to resolve issues could start and end with the words we utter,  those words ushered by pride. You may wish to continue,  but may not be able. When we are found worthy of praise as to, or pertaining to our good work, we should take care to watch out for words that tends to disvalue others due to hurts that they have costs us in that past. If we don't take note of this,  it could be our last opportunity to be in that position.  This problem may make it hard to climb to the next phase of your project,  it is not about the people involved in the setting that triggers this, it is nature's cause.

Humility is key. It is what we should overtime learn to acquire. It is a tool not only needed as a solution for this problem, but is essential for success in life. Being humble doesn't mean weaknesses, neither does it mean that you should not fight for your right or worth, it means maintaining a natural respectful spirit in times of trial, lifting, difficulty, praise, heights, etc.

Thursday, July 28, 2016

Divine Miracles









Become and remain outstanding by connecting constantly to the Divine source. And watch your life take shape with no or less struggles.



Happy weekend!

Marrian Lemeh.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

In life, there's more.


In some points in our lives, we find ourselves focusing on some issues, allowing problems depress us, or succumbing to uncontrollable situations.  In either one of these we most times can not help ourselves.  The realisation of time wasted prompts some to say "life is too short to be wasted ...." and more. The question is, should one aspect of life make you forget or give less attention to other aspects of your life? Even though these problems that surface as mighty  can obstruct you in your course in life, other aspects of your life are very important and need attention just like the different specialization of cells in the body that work together to maintain you, if you magnify a problem  and focus on it, you will break down due to your neglect of the other areas of your life, you will lose focus and waste valuable time and opportunities. 

The rate of deaths caused by depression is on an increase. Depression could be caused by a variety of problems and when individuals experiencing this give it more room in their minds it occupies their whole thought and will linger there till someone or something brings them out of the dark room and reminds them that there is light outside. Sometimes the magnitude of these depression is so great that people willfully take their own lives. According to Allaboutdepression.Com "Up to 15% of those who are clinically depressed die by suicide. In 1997, suicide was the 8th leading cause of death in the United States. 10.6 out of every 100,000 persons died by suicide. The total number of suicides was approximately 30,535." One fact I have found is that if those wanting to commit suicide were rescued and lived on, they will tell you that they are so happy to be alive and privileged, and that problem would matter less to them.  In this case, seeking the greater power that can mend issues in minutes, and restore things for you will be your one and only option, God, as men could be a flame to your problems. Hence, we see that focusing on a problem will make you neglect the rest of things in your life and even end you before you begin.

In life, we come across, set or get set into meeting demands, working out our projects, accomplishing our aims and goals, living up to our standards, set limits, and the actualization of our dreams and more. All these are good and require focus. When we lose our focus due to a problem, it comes to a temporary stop, and may transit to a permanent one. This is one of the reasons why some individuals never grow or miss it at some point. Another is, if a plan is left lying due to lack of focus, opportunities for it will keep flying and will not recognise it's existence.  That brings me to another aspect of the results of magnifying our problems. 

Opportunities are lost on a daily basis due to the fact that individuals miss its arrival when attending to some unworthy problems.  At least, at that time they are not worthy of attention because they only cause downfalls as they keep surfacing especially when a major victory is close by. That makes me what to say "watch that problem, it could have an aim." That is, distracting you from something very important.  And we so often don't know when opportunities are near, so we should live ready and try leaving our problems. 

How can we deal with problems quickly so that they do not take away our lives, our focus or opportunities? One way we can do this is by bringing our dreams for our future to our constant view. This should remind us of the future we so much desire and that there is urgent need to settle or leave the problem at hand. Another way is to associate ourselves with positive and loving family members and friends that knows about the issue and still encourage us to make it. Also, and most importantly,   this remedy never fails, you can trust me on this one, that God is always there when we call. He does not sleep and everything he had made has no choice but to obey his commands.  Reading and listening to  positive speakers can help too. You see, becoming who you desire to be is not all that easy. To be that person you were made to be, a lot will fight against you, but you need to know that a lot of powers are out there just to support you. These powers are your focus and determination, motivational powers, the God's spiritual power, self will to survive ( the power of self will, etc.) 
Have a great weekend.  Much love.



Monday, June 20, 2016

Fathers for strength and much more.



While still in the fathers day celebration. I will like to make a quick shout out to the fathers  because their worth to us is indeed beyond measure. We take pride in showing off their strength, character, patience and more. We can not talk of being complete without them. Hence we Celebrate them not only in the day set aside for fathers day!

Monday, June 6, 2016

communication.

The importance of communication in any relationship can never be over emphasized. Communication is so important so that our heart is not given away to assumptions. It should be known that roughly 80% of breaks in relationships are due to lack of effective communication, this happens when there are misunderstanding and a good platform is not made so that the individuals involved can address the issue with an open mind. Even though fulfilling your roles in a relationship is very important, if there is no effective communication the relationship could easily break because communication ensures that there is no assumption, it strenghtens the bond between individuals in a relationship and it helps to ensure that feelings are understood.

When issues, problems arise in relationships, there is a tendency that the individuals involved will assume or make up stories in their mind if the real reasons for the problem is not communicated effectively to them by the other persons involved. There is a need to help eradicate or reduced assumptions in the mind of all those you involve yourself with in the various sections of life and most importantly those that are your love ones. This is needed because most times, assumptions are negative, even if your spouse knows you to some extent, he or she is prone to think negatively about you regarding the problem; that is the mistake people make. When a problem of cheating arises, and everyone knows that the spouse of this certain man is always seen with another man, even if the relationship between them is neutral, her spouse plus other observers will say she must have done something bad with the other man even if she did not. Hence, there is a need to communicate effectively.

If you communicate very well with those close to you, it helps to strenghten your relationship with them. And when you do not communicate due to pride, feelings of betrayal, lack of time or lack of a favourable medium that should enable the sharing of the real events, assumptions will build up in their minds and relationship will be very close to breaking or could be broken. Hence, communicating about every good experience to the negative ones will ensure understanding and increase the love that already exist. We should learn to take the initiative of talking about issues you feel could destroy your relationship even before a matter arises concerning that issue.

If you have a certain feeling of love, fear, hatred  for example, your love ones may not know or may not know to what degree your feelings are till you communicate it. If you have forgiven someone, a worker, your spouse for example, after a fight, they may still operate in a manner saying you have not forgiven them if you do not communicate your forgiveness to them. Indeed, to air our views and feelings, there is a need for effective communication. If we communicate our true feelings to our loved ones, it will position them properly on how to support, assist or relate with you.

Indeed, lack of effective communication could be a sign of decreased degree in bonds that has been holding a relationship. If there is no communication, there is basically no real relationship. If their is a problem, each of us should not give into pride, but take the initiative of communicating our views and real parts of the story that had led or contributed to the issue so that our relationship will be saved. There are other important things and qualities we need to have also, so that our communication and any repair in the relationship will not be in vain. We should add or create a favourable atmosphere that will enable us to communicate effectively and save our relationships.




Friday, May 13, 2016

Females; not less, but equal in worth. ( #stateofwomen)

In the beginning,  the first woman was made from the man and not with materials lesser in quality from that of the man, but from the man. Hence, we have the same materials but with an extra characteristics.  This characteristics in addition with what we have gotten from the man makes us very important,  yet we do not displace them in worth, neither do they displace us in worth. Worth itself says we are equally important,  no gender been less than the other. Even though the world from the onset of time had positioned women as less, we are correcting that in agreement with nature saying,  without us the human race is as good as gone. The women have paid all debts regarding being made first from men by  taking over and producing new men and women, and we are developers.

No one can stand and say that those who help to sustain life are in any way less. You see, men and women both play a vital role in ensuring that the human race is kept. Hence if you take away the females, the human race is doomed. Then why say women should be treated less. In rights we  should have same privilege, in opportunities, we should have same privilege,  in payment, we should have same privilege,  because we together with men ensured the existence of our race, no gender is less. We are not saying that men should not be bread winners, what we are saying is that, when we contribute in areas where men contribute equally,  we should be treated equally if we quality just as they did.

We all know that the first man played a role in our creation from the onset of time. Now nature is trying to teach us that we are equal, because irrespective of that fact, the women now have been given the role in ensuring the continuous existence of the men that once aided their creation. Hence, their gender that first aided our existence and our gender that aids their continuous existence, we are equally important, and should be treated equally. And this is achieved by giving us equal opportunities. Let us learn from nature, there is no argument here, and no respect is lost in this process.

We, the females, are developers. From the basic unit of the society,  from the family,  we ensure the smooth running of the home, like the men, directly or indirectly.  In the communities,  we are needed, and our wisdom establishes. In the society at large,  extending to the nations,  we have important roles to play.  The capacity of our brains is not less compared to that of the males. Our emotional character is not a disadvantage. Rather, our emotional character gives us an alert and sensitive nature, and we are able to discern what men can not. We have aided in the development of our various countries.  If we had not played our assumed roles as only house wifes, the men would not have gone far with their plans. Today, we have decided to stand in our true worth, in our totality, and we want to be awarded equally like the men are.

Sex or gender have never being a true standard measurement for worth. If we have decided to go the extra mile, it is because we can. We know we are equally important,  no compromising,  we hence demand equal rights,  privileges, payments and positions. We are who we are, we are the equal halves of men. We are women.



Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Let it go for a change ~ Black Americans.

People, Hoodie, Male, Person, Man, Young, Portrait, One

  This thing that has been in my heart.... It stayed there boiling. It was an observation, an observation that I did not know how to let out. But that day came..... and past. That day came when I was triggered to say my mind. Our professor led the discussion, and I had to say my mind. Is it a big deal? Well, yes it is. Black Americans have fought this battle for so long, and are still fighting. And, it just seem like the battle is never going to end. Why would you treat me this way? I am an American Citizen too! Why are we not getting our full rights? And so on.... Yes, I do not totally disagree with a fellow when he said that, " we still see discrimination here and there....." Even though they may be right in some way, one thing the black American citizens need to know is that, this problem will live as long as they hold on to the mentality that they are been treated less, because with this mentality, they will view a normal reprimand as one directed due to discrimination, and in the process continue to remind the whites that they are blacks, and it will be depressing.


  Using a scenario, in almost every family, a child or some children could be considered the best by other children because they do really well and mommy or daddy love them more than the rest. This mentality, could build up in the mind of those kids who think that they are not loved as much. This will definitely be disturbing as these kids will or may never perform well by looking down on themselves. Until they let go of this thought and strive to do better, be better, by seeing that the other kids are been praised because of their hard work, they may be forever doomed to demotion. Love yourself for who you are, color can not and has never been a measure of worth. By the time this beautiful creations know that they were been pronounced citizens and that they really have equal rights and quit remembering the past, then, then the black citizens will emerge in their true worth.

  The blacks constantly remind the whites that" I am black! AND THAT IS THE REASON YOU TREAT ME THIS WAY! EVEN IF THAT HAD NOT ACTUALLY CROSSED THE HEART OF THE WHITE AT THAT TIME. By indirectly reminding the whites this, they cause a recycle of what had been thrown into the bin. Really, if any black had worked hard, and walked into whatever place that held there promotion confidently, the chances are that they will get they request. This boils down again to my last post that, you are what you think, and will be treated the way you believe you are, because you will unconsciously act that way. So, let's help stop this recycling of the past.

  It is indeed depressing to be demoted, hence, let us help matters by not demoting ourselves first. If you truly know your worth, work in your worth irrespective of what. The surrounding does not define a person, it is the person that defines him or herself. When the surrounding is made to define a person, then doom is set at loose. We know how painful it had been. And I know it is high time we stop this for a better future!

Living has never been better than when you operate in the world you desire and be the person you truly are. When we do things in the right way, we get right results. Believe in positive change to be able to see it come. Remember, Color has never been a measuring tool for the worth of anything. If you live in self underestimation and pity, then you will be underestimated. Let's change the picture.




image from:
Pixabay. 2016. People Hoodie.  https://pixabay.com/en/people-hoodie-male-person-man-875617/

Achiever Mel. Your Thinking Process.





                     



"Well, If I can see your thoughts and imaginations, I will know who you are and where you are heading in life"

            -Marrian Lemeh.

Sunday, May 8, 2016


Happy mothers day! Our mothers show a true and deep love for us all! Let's celebrate them!

If  I came into this world, I must have been brought in through a mother.

If I survived, my mother must have played a major role.

If  I lived happily,  my mother must have contributed to that.

She gave a lot of time and years. Today is to celebrate her, but my love will remain for her all through my life!

Happy  mothers day!

Friday, May 6, 2016

#Do not compromise.


Yes, the world is going through a global change. Indeed, we have seen positive outcomes, inevitable negative set-ins. The earth, being a constant that has watched the transition in men; it has indeed seen the wisdom and cowardice of men that lived on it, and is still viewing from a state of rest. From the onset of time, truth has established the world. Truth has led to the discoveries of things that existed, that was once unknown to us. And Truth had been patient enough to watch men as they try to understand things that existed before them and in the process, call it what they like; it had been patient until men came to the real understanding of their discoveries and amended their first misinterpretation. Truth, though powerful, teaches you ever so slowly and yet without an audible voice, speak volumes. Even though truth is fundamental to all things, some men and women have decided to cut it to their satisfaction, and have denatured themselves, and have hence created their version of lifestyle.


Sorry to say, no matter the transition that keeps modifying the truth for some negative reasons. Set rules are always constant. Just as the constant in the maths algebra, and those in chemistry and physics theories, this already set rule for the world is constant. No matter what rules now and tomorrow, or who influences now and changes the norm; the only thing that went through a change is the mentality of the people in question, plus their group or those that went along. It is impossible to cut the truth. TRUTH CAN NOT BE REDUCED, YOU CAN ONLY SEAL IT TEMPORARILY. People tend to compromise because of money, or desire, or positions, what ever it may be. The constants of life will surly balance the equation. There are behaviors that drew certain things to people from the set rules of life, hence, do not compromise.


If any one compromises, and continues doing so, he or she will live with rules establish by him or her that contradicts that which is right. And they will be denatured. For example, people walk naked now on the street due to a compromised lifestyle in dressing, and believe me, they liken this to one of their greatest achievement in their lives, while that is a disgrace in truth. This means people are loosing themselves to degradation. They get an upside down mentality because their life is already compromised by they themselves. Soon...... Woman may start getting married to dogs, since gay marriage is approved; this is because when the normal truth has been cut short by people, they act in the reverse direction. Really, many have been denatured, look around you and see through a naked eye, not the one already tinted. And I tell you, It is a pity.


Why am I saying all this?  well, this is because it is the truth. And the truth begs no one, It only balance equations, and the result is been produced day in, and day out, directly and indirectly.  The version of lifestyle that is in use by most people today  dictates the life of others that decides to follow. (smiles....Forgive me, but, no one should dictate your life for you sweet heart, you own it all to yourself, and your actions tell of what you are now. Indeed, I will say, live positively, so that life will balance out a positive solution for you, you can not go wrong with that. And yet , it is an advice with love attached to it and not the contrary.


Do not let the changes of life define you. Life itself responds to what you do, work with it and not against it. Truth, can never go below itself. Live right and live more. You can do it, because you are to construct your life!

Never Give Up (Award Nominated Short Film) [Motivational Video]





                                                  

Good morning people! Have you ever felt like giving up? Well you should know that it's only those who persist that knows that, great heights can not cost less as easy things do. You can make it. Just believe it.







film from



Capture That Films. Never give up ( Award Nominated Short Film) ( Motivational video.) online video clip. You Tube. You Tube 18, March, 2014. Web. 6, May, 2016.

Monday, May 2, 2016

Achiever Mel. Friendship for relationships.





Jessica is married, and I felt like having her share her experience briefly on how friendship before marriage has helped her in her marriage life!

Saturday, April 23, 2016

Openness in family.

Fall from within.

Kayak, White Water, Water Sports, Courage, Skill


 At some points in our lives,we have fallen, be it academically, socially, emotionally; a passive fall or a very serious kind, we have fallen at some point. And there goes this encouragement for us to rise, no matter what has caused us to fall, we are commanded, expected, encouraged to rise. This is because, mistakes are sometimes inevitable, and could lead us to perfection. As it is said, it is better to take the risk and be courageous in achieving our goals than not to take it at all. Yes we may fall, but with the right spirit, you are expected to rise. Even though falling and rising gives a positive picture, there are some kinds of fall, those kinds from which rising would be difficult; their causes come from within, not external.

To see us positively rise, it is hence very important to talk about this. When you fight hard to achieve your aim, day and night. when you give all you have to be who you know you are. And thanks to the set principals of life, yes, you are expected to get there by persistence and seeking help from the right sources. During the time or times of fulfillment, do not let those inward enemies to rise . Do not allow yourslf the pleasure of welcoming pride. Do not speak or act with a mindset of 'I am all'. Do not allow your imaginations that is suppose to help create and advance your future lag behind by dwelling in your current state of fulfillment. These are enemies because, the mind in connection with your imaginations will not be able to create or help you visualize more about your future but will relax to enjoy the present. Also, pride could set in, and you, may not be able to tolerate what you could endure before from your friends and family. You may find yourself seeking unnecessary respect and acting irrationally. We should not forget that the set principals of life are still at work. That is, from the onset of time, it is known that certain things are mandatory to happen to someone based on what that person has done. The times may vary for different people, but as it is said, you would have to reap what you have sown. No one will want to destroy what they have achieved. Hence, to still achieve more after coming to the full knowledge of who you really are, do not destroy it.

Also, some inward destructive behaviors could come to play if we, having achieved some things relent in taking seriously our new and increased roles. This form of device, Laziness and procrastination will bring our success to a halt. Do we think that as we come to the fulfilment of some of our goals we could relax? No, rarely will you find a greater height without  more and new responsibilities. and to get past that part of your life, you need more work. We should not only come to know who we are, but also strive to overcome the challenges and move forward. you could change the company you keep right now if necessary, or task yourself even more. You need not to be deceived. Your life is basically dependent on you and the actions you take.

Life here on earth is once. This once, I would say strive to know who you are, why you are here. I would say, do not let external factors define you, and also, do not let internal destructive behaviors bring you to a halt in life. Take control of them all. And most importantly seek God's help. I say this because some things can be beyond your control. Live right, you can not be positive while you engage yourself with the negatives. And finally, do not be a slave to fear. 



Image from

Pixabay.2016.https://pixabay.com/en/kayak-white-water-water-sports-798009/


Thursday, April 14, 2016

Would you say, 'love is easy to start?'


Freezing rain day in Orilla Orillia, ON

The role of starting a relationship was traditionally for the men, even if the ladies or women were first interested. Although today, the reverse is becoming the case, which is indeed a shame. Should I say that something had lead to this, that something had lead to women proposing to men? Well, I will not say that there is a single cause or that there are specific causes to this effect. We have also noticed that some men are shy when it comes to approaching a lady, and in the long run, may not do so. Also, some men or guys are fearless; fearless, even if the lady detests them. Even in the midst of this, should you say that love is easy to start? Just as I do not support generalizing, and saying 'all' in most things, I would say, Love may or may not be easy to start.

A very close friend of mine, said on his Facebook page, quoting him, ' love is easy to start, but is like war to end. The reason I quoted him is because I want to emphasis on the generality of his tone. I have seen couples start easily and broke up easily, have seen couples start easily, and their breaking went tough, I have also seen couples start roughly and lasted forever, I have seen couples established in minutes and split in seconds. It is not about the breaking up, we do not rejoice in that. Let's look at the possibilities where relationships can be established easily. In most cases, the man in this scenario was very observant and observed to notice what the lady loves, her character, her happy time and more before approaching the lady or that the lady just loves him. It could also be that he has helped her through times of roughness and was there in times of need that lead her to respecting and understanding him. Also, he may portray her desired characteristics she values in a man, or may have what she likes.

Looking at the other phase, or segment. I take a step back to the past to recall this scenario with a friend of mine that was once an enemy, but now slightly close. I tagged him as that not because he was indeed an enemy but because of his manner of approach. He was not insulting, but was untamed. I would have given him some respect because I try to do so with every one even if I know my final answer. Manner of approach, undesired characters she finds in him, his lack of resources. Also, her internal and emotional turmoil, heart breaks she suffered, his insufficient qualities, her not being ready. All things could give rise to rejection from ladies, could make them say no.

Hence, I will urge us to be patient, have the right mentality and have a good and clean heart when approaching matters of this kind. Also, I will work on the section where I will talk about helping individuals ( mainly guys ) to overcome fear, shyness. It should be noted that I do not support certain things during courtship, as my values contradicts with those things. Let us try to observe, understand the person we intend to be close to, so as to know how to approach, hence making it a little easy to start a relationship.




Image from.

The weather network US. 2016. Freezing rain day in Orilla. http://www.theweathernetwork.com/photos/view/beautiful-weather/freezing-rain-day-in-orilla/25668926

Thursday, March 24, 2016

Freedom at its loose.



This one desire is cherished by everyone, every individual, small, great, even the little ones understand its value. You should be able to guess what this so desired thing is. Freedom, needs no definition as it is able to defines itself, it is the state of being free. It gives liberty to whom ever finds it or to whom it is granted. Even though freedom is looked at as a positive gain, its product is directly dependent on whom it is granted, because it has brought about positive and more negative results today.


 Back in the ancient times when countries were yet taking its shape and evolving from kingdoms, trying to get their own identity, they fought for freedom. As the world advanced, we came to the  knowledge of the fact that authoritative governing can be fought against, but a government that will understand the rights of its citizens as humans as is required of life is upheld. In our homes today, the right to become who you want to become is given to different members of the family with little or no pressure. Even the toddlers have their choice of what and where they feel like playing, and often fight for freedom in their little way.


Nevertheless, freedom is today to be blamed for most of the negative outcome of things around us. Freedom is not negative, it is purpose to stand as a positive gain to us, but it has been used to device, create and establish wrong things today. In a bus, I watched, not once or twice, people who unconsciously act in a weird way, yet they seem conscious. Getting into the bus, they can tell when they will come down, but in the short period of time they are in the bus, they move in a strange way and continue that way, they seem not to care about the people watching. The influence of drugs makes them unable to control themselves. Drugs makes people unable to control embarrassing  actions they could have been able to control. This is the choice and outcome of those individuals. Today,  wrong choices are backed by freedom rights and individuals force governments to constitutes negative laws. Today, some aspiring heads will throw away good virtues and announce their support for the choices of the people, even if this choices were purely wrong, and go on to constitute them. From the wrong choices due to freedom of individuals, it is extending to become laws, and soon the world may uphold wrong choices and ask for freedom to successfully execute them openly. Millions have lost their lives due to rights to  have guns in some countries. Abortion has been supported as a right in America due to the demand of its citizens, gay marriage is a right in some countries. Soon  drugs could become a legal right, prostitution could become a right soon also as wrongs are becoming right for some.

What is freedom and its desire doing to us today? Governments needs to understand that the reason why there is government in the first place is to set the right laws. If there is no government, then no law, and everyone will have all rights to any thing. Government should support rights that supports life and liberty for the right things. Today people fight to get an established law or rights to more negative things . And in turn the well established country and its achievement could be ruined gradually by the accumulation of negative freedom that has been granted, and its control may not be possible.  Hence in our various levels as heads, one main reason that makes us heads is to prevent the destruction of what is in our duty to protect. As individual, it is our duty to prevent ourselves from self ruin, we should not give ourselves all that we desire.This is the only way to prevent the doom that lies in the future. From the onset of time, the creator understood the importance of freedom, but he knew the end result of total freedom, so he made restrictions to save his work and effort from destruction by making commandments, because it is not every thing that is right.


Image from
                       Freedom in christ.http://grandmageri422.me /category/freedom-in-christ/

Friday, March 11, 2016

Strength.


Finding strength is very important, without which you may malfunction. It is required for each new levels in our life, it is required to be able to come out of misery. It is amazing how people easily fall into emotional distress easily. People tend to fear death less to be able to take their own lives, or intentionally get themselves to their point of death. Looking at the passive results of uncontrolled emotions, we find people who live miserable lives due to a mistake.  Betrayal, or any thing negative, even a disbelief in themselves. Their strength may come fro you.

Believe it or not, a word of encouragement, showing love to, or your care for someone could be the source of strength for that person at that time. Some have decided not to take irrational decisions as they had planned due to the unexpected extra care of a friend or a stranger. There are various source of strength for different kinds of people, when needed, some run straight to it. To some, their emotions can't allow them think clearly as to look for strength in the trying times but are saved by the intervention of a special person.

The need of strength can also be seen when an individual is in need of encouragement. Without the help of some people,  dreams would have died, achievements would have existed in imaginations and died in thoughts.we sometimes find ourselves in need of encouragement, in need of strength, directly or indirectly. In this times, any one that surfaced to our rescue will have a special place in our hearts.

I encourage you to pay more attention to those around you, your loved ones, your friends, colleagues at work,  or even a stranger. Some unusual, but not threatening signs of depression could be a symptom. Also, try not to hurry off and forget a request from someone you know that needs your encouragement. This things may appear small,  but have tremendous effects as they pile, so that we can together build the world we live in with a positive atmosphere.

Monday, February 29, 2016

Great America.



Great America.

 One of the things I have always talked about, be it directly or indirectly is relationships. Our daily lives, and how well it goes largely depend on how we relate to things, people, situations, our believes etc. With this in mind, let's not narrow our view of the word 'Relationship' to be a word dealing with how two different genders create intimacy between themselves. America is a country held up high due to the transitions it was made to pass through. The things that had happened to it in the past that has brought it to this present is not all pleasant. It is a country that went through challenges, challenges that if we tell other countries to pass through, they will politely back away from. This challenges has or is the main factor why this country has an open access to things, secret of success hidden to other countries. No, I am not saying that problems bring success in all areas, but some problems that occur as challenges must be dealt with in order to get out a secret for success.Today, I sit back and admire where this country has gone, what it has achieved, the people it has, and the way their mentality work. With this, I pray it progresses and not fall.
I want to take you back to Abraham Lincoln. He's address, the Gettysburg Address. Yes, that address. The reason is because, I believe that if not totally, but in some way, that address will be helpful for Americans today. This address addresses the fact that as one people of America, every Citizen should live in one mindedness, as to agreement, and not fight one another or be a cause to that effect. Why am I saying all this, and why am I bringing in different or what seems to be different topics into this, one may ask. Well, I know that, being able to relate with people, situations will be helpful to sustain the America we view today. Also, if we look at Lincoln's speech about the people that died because of the slavery issues in this country then, and his call for unity, we should be able to apply the sole purpose of that speech, not the aspect of the slavery, but the aspect that calls every one together in one agreement, believing that all together as one citizen should unite to be able to take one same decision. And be able to see every citizen of America as an American whether he or she comes from Mexico, Brazil, Alabama, white or black etc. Be it southern or northern America not just one section of it, or one section of people. Little things we ignore, that actually become monomers, the basis of greater things should never be ignored, if you cherish a united country.
The reason why I say this today is because, I see people who are suppose to be leaders of a whole country indirectly and unknowing to them dividing the country. We have to value the make-up of our being, as the different body organs perform different functions that aids the whole functioning of the body. The same applies to a country, do not talk negatively about a part of you unless you don't want to stand. I see aspiring heads to be already criticizing, instead of handling issues with care, and relating with them in an appropriate way, that is why leaders evolve. It is better to correct your whole with love and good relationship so as to function well, and you avoid siding with one part and be against another part of what makes you a whole, because without them you are not totally complete.
With the right relationship, America at some stages of it's development has achieved success, let the leaders to be become aware of this and not break what is healing.


               source of photo from
pictureorphoto.blogspot.com. http://pictureorphoto.blogspot.com/2012/01/united-states-of-america flag-pictures.html

Friday, February 19, 2016

See a problem differently and get a different solution.



In our day to day lives, we are faced with problems, difficulties, and so many other issues. There have been different institutions established to help people with advanced and minor problems. I would like to tell you that the ability to solve problems is directly proportional to the way you see the problem and the resources you have.  Some people give up on a problem without trying at all to solve it, some try solving it with a different pattern from another person. Seven different people could bring seven different approach to solving one problem,  and hence get different results. The way you view a problem will determine how you will approach it.

With different personalities, nature, mentality, maturity, different solutions emerge. When we are in relationship issues, family problems, we should as individuals, try to think of solutions not as it suits our personality, because,  it could be harsh to the other person involved. we should bring the positive and the negative possible outcomes of the decision, and evaluate them before taking it. Don't narrow your thoughts,  look at the future to come, how it will affect them, how will it portray me, is it fair, etc . We should take maximum care when trying to make decisions because they determine your future and in turn determine the future of your loved ones. When you make good decisions,  no matter how hard it is,  in the long run you will enjoy it.  When you give in to quick decision making or anger influenced or even decision due to excitement, you are bound to regret it later on. When angry, leave the scene to calm down,  do those things you know cools you, before engaging in making decisions. Also, I will encourage you to involve someone that is positive, someone more older than you, that seems to know,  because,  even in the cooled state, you may favor yourself, instead of giving in to the right decision.  When you are over excited,  please,  don't make heavy decisions, because,  they are mostly irrational. 

Decisions form our lives, we should take extra care before making them become  reality. With this in mind, we should look at a problem with a positive mindset that shows that we are bigger than the problems themselves. This is because we decide depending on our decision, if the problem should continue. With a calm head and an unbiased mind we will scale through. There exist different solutions to a problem, although some approaches are taken wrongly and will produce something negative. Hence let our thoughts be guided positively.

Friday, January 29, 2016

You become what you think.

I am sure this saying is not new to us, "we are what we think or become what we think. I am going to confirm that. You see, what we dwell on most times, or our constant thoughts defines us. If you want to tell what you like most, do a recalling on your constant thoughts
 If you want or desire a change in your live, start from your thoughts, because, that is where our tomorrow is formed. If you are following closely,  I said something about imagination in one of my posts; it's usefulness,  it's effects,  etc. This is closely linked to it because your thoughts form your imaginations, and your imaginations make up mostly of your tomorrow.  Nevertheless,thoughts could be positive or negative, and often destroy you if you dwell on it from the negative side, and can help you, if it is positively charged. On the other hand, imaginations mostly are things you desire, but irrespective of that, they both tend to appear in or affect your future. They  do not just jumb into your future, you will go out and do those things you have been keeping in your mind for a long time or for a short time depending on what it is. Furthermore,  I will like to assure those who have dreams and lack the ability to achieve them or have weaknesses that hinders the accomplishment of those dream, that if they keep dwelling on that thoughts and dream, the likelihood of it appearing is high. So quit the thoughts that pictures you low, it is better to immediately start forming imaginations that pictures you high for you to escape that pit. You may ask why, the reason is, the moment you decide or call yourself a loser apart from others calling you that, and you picture yourself to be one, my dear, am sorry to tell you that you are one. But I  would  not like to call you that, and of course,  I know you do not want that, so change it now. It is one of the easiest thing to do in life, just sit down and control your world.
Do not think I am sounding unrealistic, because the reality is that, the designer and builder of your life is you. And you can also be it's destroyer. To build a house, you need several materials. You need to firstly lay the foundation,  your thoughts,  imaginations are your life's building outline and foundation,  if it is faulty, you will be faulty. After you have laid the foundation, which are dreams in form of imaginations,  you consciously or unconsciously go out to do whatever it takes to achieve it. So, your thoughts are a review of who you are, if one can cut open to see within the inside being of someone, and view his thoughts,  quickly, he or she can understand the kind of person he is. This thoughts,  are hidden inside of us, because it is what makes us, and those things that makes us come from within. Thoughts /Imaginations- words-
Actions-Our life as a whole.
So, do you want to make a change today? So that your live is exactly what you want it to be. I encourage you to do so. Just in case you need to contact me for help, get in touch with me through my email  achievermel04@gmail.com.  Thank you.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

For rational decisions, Dating should not be a need, but a choice.

              

  Dating.  A need or a choice?
Today, I would like to talk about this important topic. You see, this should be understood. So we need to pay careful attention.  A need is more likely to be defined as a want that requires pressing attention,  on the other hand, a choice is a want that does not necessarily require immediate attention, as to like getting it immediately.  With choice, you are trusted to make a very good decision,  but sometimes,  needs can make you to take irrational decisions.  So in dating, or rather,  the best time, and condition to date is when it is up to us, and we know we are not under pressure.  Most women in their 30's tend to make irrational decisions on deciding their mate due to the fact that they are under pressure to get married. These pressure may come from friends,  family,  society, or even self imposed. In whatever conditions we find ourselves  we should be careful not to make decisions that affect our relationships when in need, because it will have a long lasting effect on us. Hence, even though we view dating as a need, it should not be viewed as a need but as a choice.

  Reasons why we should be seeing dating as a choice and not as a need is as follows :
-This Condition will give us the opportunity to really understand the different people we date, in order to know which is more suitable. 
-Due to the fact that we are not under pressure,  our decisions are mostly sensible. 
-We can see through to the future clearer concerning being with that person.
-During the process of dating, flaws can be seen and corrected. 
-The hidden true nature of a person will surface with time, and hence, likes and dislikes of a person will be known. 
- It helps reduce the chances of having to divorce. 

  There are other benefits of dating when it is based on choice than need. People tend to put on their best character outfit when meeting or dating, hence sufficient time should be given to discover that you maybe wrong about a person.  You may dislike this person, and with time find out he or she is just the best for you. So, in circumstances where time is not given the opportunity to play it's role in helping you with discoveries,  you end up getting those discoveries  through endurance in partnership with time later, but here you have to pay more for tutorials, just like late entry payment, you will be getting the consequences.  Everyone will agree with  me that it is good to know who you are getting together with, this is also a moral virtue. I have heard a story about a woman,  who through need, married a man because of financial help. In the process, she was killed accidentally by the man because  he did not want to raise her child which is not his child. She was killed, as she tried to prevent him from heating  her child like she also did, but one unfortunate day came, and she died in the process. The child, a girl ran away later, and when she grew,  she hated man. Before she settled with a man, a lot had to convince  her, which of course did not come easily.  

  Conclusively, we should date when we don't really need to. This is advisable so as to be able to avoid dating when we are in need of a mate, so we will  avoid choosing irrationally,  and regretting later. I say this because when in need, we take what ever comes our way. And our future will be built on faulty grounds. Have a happy  weekend. 


Monday, January 18, 2016

Sex, the base of relationships?


 


Who said sex can fill the gaps that is needed in a relationship. Why confuse the function of sex in a relationship, it does not heal the wounds in relationships, it does not create real relationships, it does not keep a relationship,  it does not tell if someone is true to you. It only satisfies a need. I read a post by someone, she was asking if it was okay to have sex with her new boyfriend, cause, it is just fresh.  The truth of the matter is sex should be removed totally,  and replaced later after marriage. If you find yourself thinking, " this lady is not just serious ", then believe me, you are heading the wrong way in terms of maintaining your relationship. Love is not sex.

Lust is acting within you no matter how you want to paint it. Ask why relationships of the recent times often break even before they begin? The foundation is the problem. Believe me, when you think less of sex and more of the person as a personality to know, with time, you will find out why she acts the way she does, why he dislikes and likes this and that, what he's action will be on that issue, what her response will be, you see clearly to correct flaws of the other person and, you will be able to understand the in depth chains, pain, bitterness suppressing him or her. And as Time goes on, he or she won't be able to do without you. You will know the right time to approach,  what to present,  cause you're sure it will appeal, and what words to use in conversations and how to settle stormy times, this things you don't find them in having sex or when sex is set in fore front, don't ask any more why relationships break, why divorce is appealing now, why it is easy to recite the vows of marriage and kick it away weeks later with advancing kick styles. Yes I  say it is a recitation,because that is what the world want to turn it into.

When you jump the gun in relationships,  you will fall, because,  vital primary steps have been left out. And the consequences will surface.  I  am not saying all those who went through it rightly don't have problems,  but, they will know themselves too well to be able to settle it, unless pride sets in, or a deliberate want to end the relationship. We should think of what's going on in the relationships of the recent year, sex, been one of the factors of its fall, should be looked at closely. In this medium, a lady or a guy could boost of having 15 girlfriends or 10 boyfriends in a year, well, that is as a result of not being serious to look for the answers to true love, and playfully,  this has extended into the marriage life, where couples divorce,  re- marry and re-marry and goes on, till he begins to boost about it. Have we lost it? No, the truth is till within us. Both with too much beclouding the reasoning of people,  patterns, way of life, they may not get it . wouldn't want a situation where by a marriage that lasts up to three years will get unbelievable glare from people. Let us do things right to get the right result. Not putting lust in first and expecting to find love in the air. 

Conclusively,  ask yourself the question,  do you really want a long lasting relationship. Even if it is hard, you have to avoid setting sex at the fore front. Do not replace love to be sex. You may even get tired of it later in marriage, as I have heard some say. Once again, love is not sex.


Love yourself for who you are.

Love yourself for who you are.
 why do you allow your thoughts limit you. Most people are the real enemies of themselves,  even when there have all it takes or the medium through which they can get to have what it takes comes their way, they here this little voice within them say," you see this? I can't do it. Believe me friend, even if you were made to solve that problem,  the person may even die without solving it. To be who you are meant to be,  you must love yourself first, not an enemy instead, by discouraging yourself,  you are becoming an enemy to yourself.  Who are those people that you see and get shy? They did not give you your actual potential,  infact, you are there for them, so that they can be blessed from what you can offer. Try speaking up even when you are afraid,  if fear arises and you know what you have to say is essential,  first convince yourself  to be able to recover your confidence before you can stand to convince others boldly. If you love yourself for who you are,  you will love what your being produces,  correct the areas you have flaws, practice to be perfect ,even if you are so lazy and know that you would advise a friend in your shoes to be determined,  of course you will quit been lazy if you love yourself,  and you will give yourself the opportunity to be a great person by opening up your views in matters, even if your audience  views your comments as nonsense,  with time, they will know your worth.
What emanates from the inside often times dominates, or creates what becomes on the outside.  Have you been called things you are not? Underestimated?  Laugh it all out,  because,  were you are is as a result of what you wanted yourself. See, no one has the capacity to position you, unless you allow it. What you call yourself is what you are, if you have not seen yourself were you want, check out, you're the cause,  not that person. Love yourself,  believe in yourself,  create your world, I mean,  create what you want with your imaginations, and work towards,  as I have said before,  the imagination of the heart, which consists of what are in your mind, are the bedrock of things that exist. Creators,  from big to small ones made use of imaginations to determine what they want and how they want it. Never settle for less than you want. 
Tips on how to love yourself more, and be yourself are as follows :
-Remember,  to succeed in life, there are qualities you need,  have the spirit of determination, please, focus on your inward gifts, potentials.
-Believe in those potentials
-Air your potential, use them for humanity 
-Improve them
-Do not keep negative companies,  so as to grow 
-work  hard to improve your potentials
-Lift other people as you go on in live.
In terms of relationship,  be with whom you love. Do not compromise,  do not settle for less than love, no matter the circumstances.  Hence, even in pain, hardship, you will happy, and that shows you love yourself indeed.
In education,  if you are not okay with your grade, if you love yourself,  you will move with the right company,  do the right things to improve, those that hate themselves unknowing to them let bad names be attached to them without bothering about.  You won't want that for someone else, then don't take it, don't be the Enemy of yourself. 
Finanlly,to love yourself is the number one factor that will determine if you will in the future be okay, or be happy, or be fulfilled.  It could be tiring, hard to the core, even risky in some situations,  but to be truly who you want to be, Love yourself. 

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

The Enemy Is From The Inside.
In most relationships, bonds suffer due to regular pattern of allowing  emotions control our daily lives. Emotions are made to create,  not to destroy,  but it destroys when it is not properly managed in adverse conditions. Misunderstanding,  that needs the medication of patience that will be accessed in minutes unknowingly to the client, will be the reason for a total fall of a beautiful relationship. When we don't control the thoughts,  words, actions,circumstances plus false reality of things create by your assuptions, we let our inside destroy the relationships we hold dear. Take your time to check yourself and make the necessary corrections. See you happier.